Pedals Falling for the General

The pedals of my bike rotated clockwise as I pedaled down the street my bum foot protruding from the bicycle’s pedal. It was a lovely Fall day and the wind was blowing up hot little dust tornadoes that would sweep down the asphalt.

I’ve always been an avid biker, not that I compete or anything, but after the wreck, it seemed like one of my only comfortable exercise options. Biking is easier on my feet and puts less strain on, as my mother and I have nicknamed it, The Little General. It indeed does get me around, though, it struggles.


Sleep Deprivation and Diamonds

A chill runs through my body as a cold sheet of wind slips over my body as the door opens. Nope, not today. I’m feeling terribly melancholy which feels awful. I spent around two hours today searching for traumatic brain injury scholarships…not really coming up with anything that I haven’t not applied for.

Honestly, the internet is sooo cluttered with information that’s either redundant or technical language that is hard to understand. However, I did find some helpful scholarships I’ve found:

Peterson’s $1,000 scholarship

Kansas TBI Waiver

Terrill Scholarship

Missouri residents: Jim &Lori Scholarship$1,000 Bressman Law scholarship

Searching the sea of jobs, colleges, etc. is just too overwhelming for me sometimes. Requires naps and tea/coffee somedays.

Both sleep deprivation and diamonds are equally hard. I am just making it through the day; honestly it’s a bit ridiculous. The day is grey and wet

The Strength of Black and White Handcuffs

Black and white handcuffs still my arms as I wake from my sleeplessness. I’ve woken into a categorized world and I’m no category. I’m a misnomer. This is how I feel now after living with TBI. There seems to be no place for my wild heart to roam in this chaotic world.

As my fingers flit through the newspaper Classified’s I wonder if I’ll always have it rough in this world. It seems as if I’ve been dealt my lifelong hand, which in fact, requires a lot of creativity in maneuvering. Creativity, I’m good at that.

Creativity is almost the last alternative in my part of the country unfortunately. There’s nothing to do but keep trying. Thomas Edison tried 1000 times to create the lightbulbs that we all use on a regular basis. So, when it boils down to it I’m just not trying the right thing. I just have to work harder at inventing my future.

To me, it seems like everyone is dealt a hand when they come into this world. And depending on the situation they become ensnared in circumstances that hold them fast to where they are. By no means am I saying its a bad thing. It’s just a trickle down effect from the decisions of our ancestors.

For example, my ancestors have been largely farmers or laborers. In my immediate family I have two farmers. I’m not bemoaning anything or saying that I’m pre-destined to labor or farm work its just an interesting reflection.

I gathered this information from a nifty little site that I enjoy finding family records on called ancestry. It’s interesting how the keys of our past in a small way are keys to our future.

So the strength of black and white handcuffs dwindles beneath my creativity. I have a secret key.

Tearing out the Seams

Twwp! Hssh! Twwp!

With my surgery coming up and in my feeble house decorating mode, I had decided that I was going to make an ottoman…

The seams on the curtain wiggle and tore back and forth as I patiently cut them outfit seemed almost like a curtain surgery. Sounds like there’s a joke to be had there but I can’t put my thumb on it.

The below-average ecstatic DIY-er that I am was so confident that I’d have this ottoman down-tap in no time. Little did I know. The project took two days and amassed around 5-6 hours of my time.

Though I am no carpenter, I successfully finished this project. My inspiration came from a Youtube video below.

Can it be done?-How to Make a Cardboard Ottoman

I followed the instructions but my efforts in comparison to above video are… a bit, shall we say, different..? Mine is not nearly as fancy as the one in the video.

Really, looking at it, it’s kind of like a piece of abstract art—Open to interpretation.

Is it a table? Is it a dog bed? gift box?

I plan on storing books in it and then for a foot rest. I have a lot of books and not enough shelf space. Besides, I’ll be moving from this residence soon and it will cut a lot of the book packing hassle, since they’ll already be in a box–ottoman.








Barista, Coffee Art

Perfk, perfk, perfk, drip, drip, drip…

The coffee pot spits out the rest of its long awaited delivery. Like a messenger cloaked in chocolatey brown, the coffee pot delivers, like an amazon same day delivery. Today’s brew is a little different than usual. The coffee filter nestled inside, like a has a special combination of spices and coffee. Because I started brewing so early, I’m calling this brew, “Up Before the Neighbors” coffee.

Up before the Neighbors Coffee

3 Tsp. Folger’s dark roast

6 sprinkles of cinnamon

1/2 tsp. cocoa

dash of nutmeg

1 tsp. Mexican vanilla

Fill your coffee pot with desired water amount depending on how much coffee you’re making. For me, I usually make 2 cups; so thats 3 Tablespoons to your 2 cups of water. Now you’re ready to fill the coffee filter with desired coffee amount and then sprinkle the 6 shakes of cinnamon, 1/2 tsp. cocoa and a dash of nutmeg.

Sit back and relax.

You, my friend, are in for a good pot of “Up Before the Neighbor’s” coffee.









Life is Fine

A salty wash of seasoning wafted through the air as I began my evening. It had been a good day; I made bread and zuppa! Soup. As I munched a sweet potato for lunch I noticed that a hawk was perched on my deck. A hawk in Kansas and it wasn’t a jay hawk! It’s curious what nature brings us when we open our eyes to witness it. It’s evening now and I smell my soup in the slow cooker almost done.

I made a ground turkey chili, with Penzy’s Chicken Spice Mix. It smells absolutely delicious and is making my stomach grumble. Making soup is one of my favorite things to make in my crockpot! Honestly, I take great creative liberties when crafting soup recipes. My step mother says that I have a knack for spice combinations and cooking. Here’s the recipe I made today. I call it Jerky Turkey Soup

Jerky Turky Soup

I can diced tomatoes

4-5 bunches fresh kale

1 clove garlic

1/2 tsp. cumin

1 can mixed vegetables

a handful of sweet potato chunks– cut thinly

1 lb ground turkey

1 tsp. Penzy’s chicken spice mix Chicken spice mix

After putting everything into the pot turn it onto the hottest setting for four hours.

Today packing ensued… EEK! Ha! Starting packing gradually, will make my transition easiest. After my surgery I will be staying elsewhere, just two months away so figured why not?

When I have a packing or cleaning drive it just takes over. I can decimate a room into boxes, SNAP!, just like Mary Poppins, who honestly was my hero growing up. How can you not love a lady who sings about spoonfuls of sugar and carries an umbrella? I quite fancy her, at least.

Have you seen the new Mary Poppins? The new rendition came out, I believe, last year or perhaps the year before, it was quite stellar! Bert’s singing penguins always get me. In my near future when I’m confined to bed for so long I might just take my friends from Mary Poppins’s along for the ride. Lord, knows I’m going to have a lot of time to fill IN BED— ALL DAY….

But, on the bright side, it will finally be fixed and hopefully my gait will return to normal and my hip/back will feel better. Alway’s something to be grateful for!

Till next time, my friends, have a blessed week!


Fighting the Implications of my Traumatic Brain Injury

The cold vent directed above my head spews out air that once I couldn’t breathe. My almost complete recovery from my accident has been a miracle; if not an anomaly.

Merriam-webster defines a traumatic brain injury as:

an acquired brain injury is caused by an external force (as a blow to the head sustained in a motor vehicle accident or fall or shrapnel or a bullet entering through the skull)

A TBI can cage you or it can set you free. My TBI has set me free. Though sometimes I flounder on the surface of striving to do the best I always try to show up and be the best I can be. After my car accident, I struggled a lot with everything from talking to walking to one of my favorite hobbies: baking. I couldn’t do hardly anything. Literally, my hands were tied behind my back.

The struggles are completely real and someday’s its unbearably painful to accept the day. 

I have fought tooth and nail today to accomplish more in my life to succeed with strength in my endeavors, though sometimes utterly failing in my efforts.

Today I did something amazing, I biked 1 1/2 miles this morning, lifted weights for 30 minutes and did something I never thought I’d be able to do…! 100 squats!

Striving to be Better

This honestly was a huge accomplishment for me. I want to see if I can accomplish the 30 day 100 squats challenge. It’s gonna be tough but if I keep my head above water and show discipline to this plan I can succeed. So here it goes!

For everyone who is reading this and has a disability or knows someone who has a TBI know that the struggle is unbearable sometimes. Literally, sometimes it is as if a huge iron is pressing against our skulls. The headaches are unreal sometimes. Brain injuries are no fun. Neither are limitations. Rising above A TBI takes courage. It takes initiative. The initiative to succeed and deny your pain. Granted by no means push yourself too hard. Please do not take this the wrong way. To succeed you must step outside your comfort zone and grip the kite strings of “what-ifs.”

When you have a TBI it will try and cut you down and put up a boundary. I am crossing this boundary follow me.

The strength we still have will surprise you. Together lets be better.

God is good and we can live and succeed!

Love always,