Blood dripped out of my cast into a little pool. Good lord, the pain is sometimes unbearable. Though I do bear it readily, bravely, I hope. There is A letter returned in the mail I had sent a week ago. 😦 Alack!My dearest hasn’t gotten a letter in quite some time. And I daresay I have missed the Christmas mailing date. I do hope he understands. Before entering the surgery I had made my soul clean again in the white light of confession. My soul cleaned again.
I have a bit of a fog about me since my surgery which justly has put me in odd spirits. I’m not looking forward to the rest of my time in bed that regrettably will be 6 weeks at least.
So I find myself in a quiet reverie where I await this fog to be lifted. Though sometimes it does seem as if the fog, as Sandburg wrote, is creeping in “on little cat feet” :). The pain after four days has decreased greatly, to my surprise and joy. I have been eating soups and cake, brownies and hot cocoa. Quite a lovely combination I think :). Not the healthiest but I do say it has proven a distraction from my severe pain.
I now have a cast stretching from my toes to my knee. That has quite mummified my leg. My foot is wrapped up like a swaddled baby. Literally the size of a small one. The doctor certainly did a fine job in wrapping my foot. I later found out my doctor is Scottish, which was quite a comfort as I sat in the waiting room, IV in being assured of a quick surgery. Oh Lord, I was feverishly scared. The anesthetist was very friendly and quite comical which also helped in my time of peril. As I quietly cried.
After my surgery, which due to the anesthesia, seemed like a blink of an eye. I awoke crying his name, my love. Crying out for him across the din of beeps and hospital lights. The nurses giving away kind smiles to shell-shocked patients. And the worried looks of those yet to be operated on. Everything was too much, I had been here before. I knew there worries, how could I ever forget the worry that had so heavily plagued my thoughts long ago.
As the nurse eased the IV out of my arm. I wondered would I recover? One can only hope. I will recover and strive as one can only do in this life.
I am already recovered sin so what is there to fear?
Animo forti animo